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Navigating Back-to-School Emotions: Self-Care Tips for Those Struggling with Infertility

By Dr. Elizabeth Grill, Psy.D.

Back-to-school season is in full swing, so cue the endless social media posts of smiling kids in oversized backpacks and the start of seeing trails of school buses making their rounds. While this time of year can be full of excitement, for those experiencing infertility, it can also stir up some pretty difficult emotions. If this sounds like you, know that you’re not alone. And if you’re wondering how to get through this season with your heart still intact, look no further.

First thing’s first — self-protection is key.

Give yourself permission to self-protect. Seriously, you don’t have to put yourself through emotional gymnastics if you don’t want to. For some, self-protection might mean hanging out with the kids you genuinely care about—like your nieces, nephews, or your best friends’ children—because you actually enjoy seeing them gear up for the school year. If that brings you happiness, lean into it.

But if it doesn’t? That’s perfectly okay too. Self-protection might also look like steering clear of stores packed with back-to-school supplies, taking a little getaway to avoid the sea of school buses and kids, or even logging off social media for a while. No one needs to see a flood of back-to-school photos if it’s just going to bring up feelings of sadness, anger, or frustration. Sometimes, the healthiest thing you can do is put up those emotional boundaries.

Now, if back-to-school is everywhere you turn, it might help to focus your energy on something entirely different. Consider involving yourself in a project or hobby that has nothing to do with school, kids, or even fertility. Maybe it’s time to start that DIY home project you’ve been thinking about. Or, you could take up a new fitness routine, try cooking a new recipe, or finally plan that weekend getaway you’ve been dreaming of. Shifting your focus to something productive or enjoyable can help drown out the noise of the back-to-school season — plus give you something positive to look forward to.

When all else fails (or even before it fails!), pamper yourself. And I mean really pamper yourself. Whether it’s taking a long, indulgent bubble bath, booking a massage, lighting your favorite scented candle, or dedicating a whole day to binge-watching your favorite show —whatever brings you joy, make it happen. Maybe it’s diving into a novel that has absolutely nothing to do with infertility, or perhaps it’s just taking a day to unplug and recharge. The point is — find what makes you feel good, and make it a priority. You deserve it!

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Back to School… and Infertility